Neha Patil (Editor)

Hamish and Andy (radio show)

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Other names
  
The Hamish & Andy Show

Country
  
Australia

Home station
  
Fox FM (Melbourne)

Genre
  
Language(s)
  
Running time
  
4:00 - 6:00 pm weekdays - Live Show (2 hours w/commercials)6:00 - 7:00 pm weekdays - Déjà vu Hour (1 hour w/commercials)

The Hamish & Andy Show (Hamish and Andy), is an Australian radio show created by and starring comedic duo Hamish Blake and Andy Lee. It began on Fox FM in 2006 and by 2007, was broadcast on the Hit Network to every state in Australia as well as the ACT for two hours in the key weekday afternoon drive time slot until the end of 2010. It has since taken on a variety of timeslots and formats. It is also broadcast in New Zealand and Dubai as a weekly highlights package. In late 2009, a 3-hour special entitled 'Hamish and Andy's Midwinter Warmer' was broadcast in the United Kingdom on BBC6 Music.

Contents

The show is the highest-rating radio series in Australian history, consistently gaining up to 20% market share in the crucial Melbourne market. The show has approximately 2.7 million listeners, and has over 1 million podcast downloads each week.

Blake and Lee announced in August 2010, they would be cutting down to a weekly show in 2011, to allow them time to pursue other projects. The final daily program aired on 3 December 2010 in Melbourne as part of their Thank You Tour.

The show aired weekly on Fridays during 2011 and 2012. In 2013, it moved to Mondays, with Hamish & Andy's Business Brunch airing Tuesday to Friday mornings. From July 2013 until December 2014, Blake and Lee hosted Hamish & Andy's Happy Hour each weekday afternoon from 3pm to 4pm.

In 2015, the show returned to the drive home time slot between 4pm and 7pm each weekday.

In December 2016, Hamish and Andy announced that they would be leaving radio at the end of 2017 to focus on their marriage to one another and their careers.

Team

The Hamish & Andy Show team is made up of:

Past team members

  • Michael "Wippa" Wipfli (now co-host of Fitzy and Wippa on Nova 96.9)
  • Guest hosts

    The show has been hosted by a special guest filling in for one of the duo on several occasions. Stephen Curry and Ryan Shelton filled in for Hamish when he was sick with pneumonia, and on 16 March 2010 Andy's now ex-girlfriend Megan Gale filled in for him while he had an operation to replace his two front teeth which were lost during an attempt to play ice hockey during "training" for the bi-bi-tri-bi-athlon (24 sports in one weekend).

    Drive show (2006-2013)

    The Hamish & Andy drive show's opening theme was a combination of The A-Team opening titles, and "Turn It Up" by hip hop group Ugly Duckling (the latter also signifying the end of the show).

    The People's Chip

    Hamish & Andy ran a competition to invent a new flavour of potato crisp. They eventually invented gravy flavour. 495 packets were manufactured and distributed for free. After the flavour became popular, a further 60,000 packets of the crisps were manufactured and again distributed for free.

    It was later announced that the gravy chip would be sold in stores all around Australia for a two-week trial period starting from 11 August.

    The People's Greyhound

    In September 2006, the duo purchased a greyhound and named it Fred Basset, after the comic strip character of the same name.

    Afghanistan

    In April 2008, the duo travelled to Afghanistan and performed their show live (except for the Friday show) alongside Australian soldiers.

    The trip to Afghanistan was first instigated when the duo received an email from an Australian soldier serving overseas, excited about hearing The Hamish & Andy Show at his base. The letter opened discussion of whether the show should go overseas and broadcast with the troops.

    Hamish & Andy, after contacting the Australian Defence Force several times, were told that they would be able to broadcast in an overseas location where the troops were serving.

    Caravan of Courage

    In October 2007, Hamish & Andy set out on their Caravan of Courage trip in an attempt to "hug" Australia, with the intention of travelling from Perth to Brisbane and visiting many small towns that do not typically receive tourist recognition along the way. They broadcast their radio show from wherever they were at 4 pm AEST each day.

    Broadcast points:

  • Day 1: Wednesday 3 October: Southern Cross, Western Australia
  • Day 2: Thursday 4 October: Norseman, Western Australia
  • Day 3: Friday 5 October: Cocklebiddy, Western Australia
  • Day 4: Saturday 6 October: No broadcast
  • Day 5: Sunday 7 October: No broadcast
  • Day 6: Monday 8 October: Tailem Bend, South Australia
  • Day 7: Tuesday 9 October: Donald, Victoria
  • Day 8: Wednesday 10 October: Benalla, Victoria
  • Day 9: Thursday 11 October: Goulburn, New South Wales
  • Day 10: Friday 12 October: Bulahdelah, New South Wales
  • Caravan of Courage 2: Who Dares Dar-Wins

    In October 2008, Hamish and Andy were challenged by an e-mailer to 'hug' Australia again. After first hesitating on travelling Australia again, the duo decided, after much argument with their boss, Fox FM's Program Director Dave Cameron (AKA 'Grumpy Dave') that they would set out on 27 October for the 'Caravan of Courage II: Who Dares Dar-Wins' trip starting from Melbourne and heading up to Darwin. As they had previously travelled across Australia, they wanted to head "up the guts" of Australia.

  • Day 1: Nhill, Victoria
  • Day 2: Williamstown, South Australia
  • Day 3: Hawker, South Australia
  • Day 4: Roxby Downs, South Australia
  • Day 5: Coober Pedy, South Australia
  • Day 6: Yulara (Uluru), Northern Territory
  • Day 7: Aileron, Northern Territory
  • Day 8: Wycliffe Well, Northern Territory
  • Day 9: Elliot, Northern Territory
  • Day 10: Mataranka, Northern Territory
  • Day 11: Pine Creek, Northern Territory
  • Day 12: Jabiru, Kakadu National Park, Northern Territory
  • Day 13: Darwin, Northern Territory
  • Caravan of Courage 3: Yes We Van

    Hamish and Andy announced (via a "family meeting") on the 5 August 2009 show that they wanted to go on a two-week caravan trip in America, driving from Miami to Los Angeles. They then decided that America isn't big on caravans and are looking at getting a camper van instead and, after three shows, settled on the name "Yes We Van" as a pun on the iconic quote by Obama, "yes we can", dubbing the vehicle "Abravan Lincoln" (after Abraham Lincoln). Other names included "We Come From A Van Down Under", "The United States of Ameri-Caravan", "RV There Yet?" and "American We Do It, Yes We Van". Grumpy Dave initially said no to the idea but after his job was threatened by his boss, "The Chairman", on air he then gave the green light. The duo also got written approval from Prime Minister Kevin Rudd and a blessing from the United States Embassy to travel across America. The unofficial purpose of the trip was to win $9,000 in Las Vegas playing Blackjack in order to buy a Hoverboard. They raised $1,000 in pledges by enlisting the help of 10,000 people donating a maximum of 10 cents each, doing so by hosting a mock 'pledge drive'. However, they did not end up winning the money.

  • Day 1: Monday 24 August: Dade City, Florida
  • Day 2: Tuesday 25 August: Thomasville, Georgia
  • Day 3: Wednesday 26 August: Andalusia, Alabama
  • Day 4: Thursday 27 August: Laurel, Mississippi
  • Day 5: Friday 28 August: Vicksburg, Mississippi
  • Day 6: Monday 31 August: Roswell, New Mexico
  • Day 7: Tuesday 1 September: Magdalena, New Mexico
  • Day 8: Wednesday 2 September: Show Low, Arizona
  • Day 9: Thursday 3 September: Sedona, Arizona
  • Day 10: Friday 4 September: Las Vegas, Nevada
  • Caravan of Courage 4: Great Britain and Ireland

    On 10 May, Hamish and Andy announced they were taking the caravan out for a fourth time for a "family holiday" to Great Britain and Ireland. They first completed a lap of Ireland and then visited England, Scotland and Wales. The caravan they travelled in was decided by Hamish throwing a dart at a dartboard with pictures of four different vans. The dart landed on the Renault CI Cipro 85. They named it Sir Vancelot after Sir Lancelot, a character in the Arthurian legend.

    Hamish & Andy left on 27 May 2010. After they finished the trip, they each took breaks before returning to regular broadcasting.

  • Day 1: Monday 31 May: Doolin, Ireland
  • Day 2: Tuesday 1 June: Roscrea, Ireland
  • Day 3: Wednesday 2 June: Belfast, Northern Ireland
  • Day 4: Thursday 3 June: Strauchur, Scotland
  • Day 5: Friday 4 June: Loch Ness, Scotland
  • Day 6: Monday 7 June: Ravenglass, England
  • Day 7: Tuesday 8 June: Tarporly, England
  • Day 8: Wednesday 9 June: Warwick, England
  • Day 9: Thursday 10 June: Llanwrytd Wells, Wales
  • Day 10: Friday 11: Mersea Island, England
  • Check Ya Temps

    In 2009, the boys started a campaign called "Check Ya Temps" to raise awareness of foods that may be too hot to eat on the first attempt. The website, checkyatemps.org, was established to promote the FBFT (First Bite Food Temperature) and ensure no more burnt mouths for food lovers.

    The Tall Ship Adventure; Open Your Buccaneers Tasmania

    In March 2009, to commemorate the show beginning broadcasting to Tasmania, Hamish and Andy traveled in a tall ship from Melbourne to Hobart crossing the Bass Strait. They traveled on the Windward Bound (renamed the "Taully Shore" by Hamish), a 200-year-old tall ship. During the crossing off Bass Strait they encountered heavy storms and seas reaching 8 metres. They chose Naval ranks out of a hat. Hamish picked Rear Admiral while Andy picked Commodore. Hamish was known to often give commands to Andy one of which was to marry a rat. The pair dressed up in 18th century uniforms consisting of a cutlass each and a uniform. To commemorate the occasion, the two put together a "treasure chest" of collectible items such as recordings of their shows and other miscellaneous items like pieces of leather and a poker set. The chest was later given to the Hobart Council, who later auctioned off the chest with its contents and the money was donated to charity. The chest is now owned by a private collector.

    Annual Logies Spit Roast Party

    Each year, from 2007 through 2013, Hamish & Andy hosted a spit-roast party on the last Friday afternoon before the annual TV Week Logie Awards. Listeners were invited to the Fox FM rooftop to join the party, and many Australian TV personalities appeared as guests. The boys normally ended up in a food fight with Austereo colleague and TV personality Jules Lund, culminating with the boys launching a preemptive strike on Jules in 2013. (NB: There was no Spit Roast party held in 2014 due to the ANZAC Day public holiday falling on the Friday before the Logies.)

    BYO Pool Party

    On 4 December 2009, Hamish and Andy celebrated the final show of the year with a BYO Pool Party. The free event was located at Dawes Point, Sydney. The entire pool party was streamed via the internet for listeners who were unable to attend, marking the first live Hamish and Andy video stream. The John Butler Trio and Powderfinger were house bands at the event.

    The Peoples' Bull

    Hamish & Andy announced on 20 January 2010 that they had found a competition in the newspaper "Stock & Land" to win a bull worth $6,000. They have enlisted the help of the listeners to collect the 4 weekly coupons required to enter, for the winner to share the bull with the listeners. On 22 February 2010, it was discovered that the two didn't win the bull, nor did anybody else who committed to collect coupons to represent Hamish & Andy.

    Conjoined Twins

    Hamish and Andy accidentally offended a listener when talking about conjoined twins and thus took on the challenge to be physically conjoined by a specially made outfit for nearly a week which ended on a Rove episode in 2007. Hamish was on the right side and Andy was on the left side.

    Freeating

    The duo decided to eat only free food for a week in 2009 as they noticed that there was a lot of free food around. They could not purchase food, receive food from family or friends, steal food, or eat food already in their houses. They finally were allowed to finish the challenge on an episode of Rove on 12 July.

    Ghosting

    Hamish and Andy invented a new sport "Ghosting", where they walk as close as possible to a target person for as long as possible. They have incorporated this sport in many different countries including Great Britain and Ireland, and China when they attempted to ghost a soldier. The boys knew that they had created a huge hit sport, and their enthusiasm for it crossed borders. Currently in America the Twin Cities Ghosting League in Minnesota is supporting Hamish and Andy as well as helping troubled youths in the Minneapolis/St.Paul metro area.

    Hungry, Hungry Heroes

    Hamish and Andy along with a team of food-lovers attempted to do a challenge where they will find certain restaurants that serve a special meal that is so big that if the person finishes it completely, their name will be put on a plaque or on the wall in the restaurant. Of the five people that competed in the challenge none succeeded.

    Bi-Bi-Tri-Bi-athlon

    Hamish and Andy decided to compete in 24 events throughout the weekend of 6 & 7 March. They set rules that they can complete no less than 51 percent of a sport before moving on to the next, in order to have a chance at influence the outcome of the game and only compete in official sanctioned leagues or competitions of the relevant sports. The Bi-Bi-Tri-Bi-athlon was held throughout the country. Originally planned for the weekend of 6 and 7 March 2010, on 2 March Hamish and Andy were training with coach Shane Warne when Andy split his chin and knocked his two front teeth out whilst playing ice hockey, after which it was announced that the event would move to the weekend of 13 & 14 March due to the injury. To prepare for the event, Hamish had a full body wax and added a new Olympic rings tattoo to his arm. They completed the event on Sunday evening the 14th with a final tally of nine wins, one draw and fourteen losses.

    See No Evil, Hear No Evil

    After watching the movie of the same name starring Gene Wilder and Richard Pryor, the pair decided to go 50 hours without the use of one of their 5 senses. For the weekend of 6 & 7 February 2010, Andy went without his sight and Hamish went without his hearing. This was achieved through the use of eye patches and dark glasses for Andy and specially moulded earplugs for Hamish.

    The premise was that each would accommodate for the other's missing sense. Hamish became Andy's eyes, leading him when the pair were walking, or describing what was happening during other activities, including a cooking class. Conversely, Andy became Hamish's ears, writing down what he and others were saying so Hamish could follow the conversation.

    Gap Year Green Room

    During the shooting of Hamish and Andy's Gap Year in 2011, the weekly Friday drive show was broadcast live from Andy's apartment (referred to as Andy's Lair) in New York City.

    In addition to the Friday drive show, the boys hosted a separate pre-recorded Thursday afternoon show from 3pm-4pm. It was broadcast from backstage at their Brooklyn studio (a disused plastics factory) for 10 weeks in 2011, prior to each episode Gap Year on the Nine Network that evening at 8:30pm. This show often interviewed any celebrity guests appearing in the episode of Gap Year that evening, or teased location stories with audio previews.

    Thank You Tour

    To celebrate the end of the show in the regular format, Hamish and Andy broadcast their final five shows to live crowds in Perth, Adelaide, Brisbane, Sydney and Melbourne between 29 November 2010 and 3 December 2010. The shows were free and all featured live bands, including INXS with Dan Sultan and Guy Sebastian at Fox Studios Australia in Sydney, and U2 at the Sidney Myer Music Bowl in Melbourne.

    Regular segments

    These are former regular segments to the show when it was in its original 2 hour format, however some segments have returned on the newer hour-long "Happy Hour"/"Business Brunch" format if the segment and the content fits the topic of the day.

    Blast from the Past

    Every Wednesday, a pre-recorded phone prank is played. Formerly, the challenge was simply to keep the other person on the line as long as possible. Presently, the challenge is for one of the boys to convince the person who answers that he is someone from that person's past. A challenge is typically added in which the prankster has to use a specific topic or request in their conservation with their purported "old buddy".

    PA System

    Every Friday, The PA system is where Hamish & Andy take callers that have something to say to a certain person or group that they deem important. There are often a range of announcements from "I'd like to tell Ben that dinner's on the table and come now please" to "The bowling party is changing to 7pm". It recently became "International" for podcasters who want to participate.

    Fred Basset

    At the end of the show on Friday, Hamish, much to the disdain of Andy, reads the Fred Basset comic on air. (This is not to be confused with the show's purchase of The People's Greyhound of the same name.) Andy has tried many different ways to prevent Hamish from reading this comic, including:

  • Playing with his mobile phone's ring-tones, interrupting Hamish with comments, blackmailing and bribing him.
  • Bringing Hamish's mother into the studio, who begged him not to read Fred Basset.
  • Ringing Hamish's then girlfriend Anna and threatening to obtain a 'sex-ban', but Hamish ignored them both and continued.
  • Tricking Hamish into reading in water and saying that he was talking into an underwater microphone, when in actuality he was inaudible.
  • Andy has also most recently enjoyed employing far more physical attempts to prevent Hamish from reading the comic, such as firing tennis balls at him from a machine, having him 'egged' by schoolgirls, punching him during Basset and covering him in dog-food and unleashing a pack of dogs onto him.
  • Andy also once simply walked right out of the studio and went home when the Fred Basset Segment started.
  • Andy has also retaliated by reading a different comic: Snake Tales.
  • To 'celebrate' Earth Hour, Andy made Hamish read the comic in the disabled toilets with the lights turned off, being able to use matches scattered on the floor for light. He also placed the comic in the toilet.
  • During the See No Evil, Hear No Evil challenge, Andy played a pre-recorded message over the top of the Fred Basset comic while Hamish was deaf and could not hear the recording.
  • Andy got Hamish's childhood idol Dr Karl Kruszelnicki to call in and convince Hamish not to do the comic, however, Hamish changed the doctors mind and continued to read the comic.
  • Andy put Hamish in a wheelie bin and locked him in during the reading of the comic. Then moved the bin outside the studio so he could not be heard.
  • Andy managed to prevent Hamish from reading the comic strip when he got him to put a wooden box on his head & began to pour cockroaches from the top. Hamish however got to read Basset the following Monday when he sneakily got Jack to play a song he had created reading out the comic.
  • Andy also managed to prevent Hamish from reading Basset by talking with Hamish's housemates and offering Hamish the position of the drummer on the game "Guitar Hero" if he didn't read Basset. Hamish accepted and received a flood of hate-mail for the following week until he read Fred Basset on the next week.
  • During one reading, Andy grabbed a hammer and smashed an LCD monitor in the studio which Hamish was reading the comic off, much to the dismay of the station's General Manager.
  • During one reading, Andy used physiotherapy electrical equipment to electrocute Hamish's hands and face. Hamish burst blood vessel in one eyes afterwards.
  • Making Hamish read the comic in a coffin, then burying him.
  • In 2011, the segment of Fred Basset was ended due to the lack of time on the new show. However to keep the public able to have the "Basset Experience" Hamish started a section on the website called the "Brotherhood of Basset" where he uploads a comic a week then writes underneath the comic how he would present it on the show.

    Tell 'Em They're Dreamin'! (The Trading Post Game)

    Every Thursday, Hamish & Andy play a pre-recorded segment in which they take turns to telephone someone who has placed a classified advertisement in the Trading Post newspaper to sell a particular item (the advertisement having been selected by the other person). The task is for the caller to ask five questions about the item, and try to work out what item is being sold. The name Tell 'Em They're Dreamin' is a reference to the film The Castle. This was an idea given to Hamish and Andy via an email by one of their listeners, Nathan Lauterbach.

    Hey, Get Us an Autograph!

    Hamish & Andy ask their celebrity reporter, Brad Blanks, to obtain an autograph from, or arrange an interview with, various New York celebrities. On several occasions he has tried to interview Robert De Niro only to receive abrupt, often monosyllabic answers. Celebrities will often comment on his appearance, in particular Ricky Gervais, who has made jokes about Brad's "sweaty" appearance, and well as Clive Owen who mentioned Brad's penchant for arriving at Red Carpets under the influence of alcohol.

    Trivial Claims Court

    A listener calls in with a trivial question. One example is 'Do penguins have knees?'. Other callers then provide their response to the question. Usually twelve callers are taken, simulating a criminal jury.

    Race to find celebrities; "Old School" Celebrity Crush Hunting

    On occasions Hamish and Andy battle against each other to find famous celebrities for different purposes. Two of the most popular searches were to find:

    A Celebrity Endorsement for their Greyhound, Fred Basset. The two celebrities were Paris Hilton and John Travolta. But by the end of the competition, Hamish gave up on finding Paris Hilton, and instead found Mike Whitney. Two famous celebrities whom two listeners had a crush on when they were younger. The celebrities were Taylor Hanson and Jennie Garth. Titled Celebrity Crush Hunt, Hamish and Andy were still neck and neck in finding their celebrities but on 24 May 2007, Hamish won the competition by finding Taylor Hanson.

    In 2009, Hamish & Andy battled against each other to make contact with celebrities, so that two listeners could interview their 'old school' celebrity crush as a teenager. Andy tried to track down Brian Austin Green while Hamish was after Steven Seagal. The boys employed several different strategies in order to get them onto the show. Andy pretended to be the owner of a jewellery chain in Australia named 'Cactus Fire', in an attempt to convince Brian Austin-Green's niece to get Brian onto the show. Whilst Hamish bought five cases of Stephen Seagal's energy drink Lightning Bolt, which cost him $250 and has never arrived to him. Eventually, Andy won the race to get Brian on the show, and his young fan Becky was able to speak to him.

    Experimental as Anything

    Once a week Hamish and Andy do odd experiments to see if any truth comes out of it. One example is testing to see if it was possible to dry a black thong under a public bathroom hand dryer. Another segment involved them eating biscuits and potato chips, and then proceeding to 'send a toffee down' in order to get the remaining food stuck in their teeth out. After concluding it had a 100% success rate, Hamish joked at a later date that most chewing gum companies entire selling point is the fact that they serve an almost identical function. A running joke at the beginning of the segment is a comment on the unusually long length of the opener, the opener is about 10 seconds longer than the opener of other segments.

    Forced Connect

    Hamish and Andy call two phone numbers (usually of celebrities) at the same time to hear the conversation occur as the victims try to figure out what is happening, then Hamish and Andy then reveal themselves as the pranksters. Celebrities that have been called include Kyle and Jackie O, Jules Lund and Kamahl, Warrick Capper and Stephen Curry, Hamish's housemates, John and Haydo, as well as connecting Horgs with a McDonald's in the hope that amidst the confusion Horgs would try and order food.

    If You're Single And You Know It Pat Your Head

    Once a week Hamish and Andy invite listeners who are single and in cars to pat their heads (Hamish & Andy also pat their heads, although Hamish is in a relationship). They also invite listeners to call in and tell them the results of the patting.

    Two Become One (2 Person Prank)

    This segment is based on the fact that Hamish and Andy's voices sound very similar on the phone. Hamish and Andy ring up a store or hotline, and have a conversation with that person trying to fool them into thinking it is one person. After each sentence a bell that the person on the other end cannot hear sounds and they trade sentences. After a while a longer bell will ring and they will trade words. Notable victims include Andy's Mum and Megan Gale (but she cottoned on almost immediately).

    Family Meeting

    When Hamish and Andy want to present an idea to the listeners they announce a "family meeting". Previous family meetings have included discussions about trips overseas, such as "The Caravan of Courage; Yes We Van", "The Caravan Of Courage; Who Dares Dar-wins","The Caravan of Courage; Great Britain & Ireland" on 5 May 2010 and a week-long trip to Japan in order to interview Tom Hanks.

    Bring Out Your Dead

    On the last Friday of every month, the guys announce a new segment that was originally deemed to be not good enough for radio by the producers of the show. An example of one of the segments ran was "Radio Crimestoppers" (a radio version of Crimestoppers) which was simply a segment created by Andy in which he described a 'crime' he witnessed (in this instance littering) and described the perpetrator verbally. Several callers rang-up claiming to know who they were, including one man who rang up to say that he fit the description, and whilst innocent, was being yelled at and pointed out by passing drivers.

    Hot or Not Bots

    Each week, Hamish picks out a robot which the guys then decide it is hot or not. One example was a small robot designed to clean up crumbs.

    HB:BC

    Originally was HB:HT which stood for Hamish Blake's Hot Topic, but after presenting two Hot Topics Hamish decided it was too hard to determine if his topic was hot enough for the show (Andy disagreed his second topic was actually hot) Hamish decided to close that segment and replace it with HB:BC which was Hamish Blake's Big Call. Examples of a big call are:

  • Deleting Barack Obama from the show's Twitter account
  • Minus One Letter Movie Trailers

    As the title describes, the boys take one letter out of a famous movie title, and record a spoken trailer about that film instead, so far they have had:

    Live Ringtones

    Briefly done during March 2013. Each week Hamish and Andy bring in a musician to play a live version of a popular phone ringtone. Examples include the "piano riff," "strum", "harp" and "marimba" ringtones, as well as Bernard Fanning recording the "bark" ringtone.

    Random John

    Random John was a segment that involved the boys calling a phone number at random, and hoping for a John. If they were to get a John, they would earn one John Point; in the event that the recipient was named John Johnson, it would be worth fifty John Points, and in the event that the call was picked up by a John Johnny Johnson, they would earn one hundred and twenty John Points. If, on the other hand, the call recipient was named Rob, they would lose a John Point, as an email from a podcaster that stated they would never get a John lead them to believe that Robs were the nemeses of Johns. After it emerged that the Manchester-based Key 103 radio station had picked up the segment and were separately playing for John Points, Hamish & Andy declared the start of a Random John World Cup; since this, a number of additional radio shows also started playing Random John. Hamish & Andy eventually scored their first John Point on 27 May 2011. This led to some jubilation in the studio, as Hamish put it: "...somebody hand me poison cordial because I want to die, I've lived it all..." Upon becoming the leaders in the Random John world cup on a John Streak of one, the duo decided to stop playing the game indefinitely, as the risk of calling a Rob and losing their John Point was too high. The segment may restart if another Random John World Cup partipant gets a John point.

    Horgs' Inventions

    Occasionally, Andy's friend Horgs is asked to talk about his latest ideas for inventions. Horgs also interviewed Tom Cruise with Andy while Hamish was at a wedding. Horgs is Andy's ex-roommate and high school best friend. His day job is selling children's books. His wife's name is Katie and he is famous on the show for beginning his segment with a whistle, a sound the guys joke is a 'signal for investors to get out their chequebooks' to invest in his idea. Listeners are then invited to call into the show if they had any questions, suggestions, or comments for Horgs about the idea. Very often, listeners may suggest improvements to the ideas, or even point out that similar inventions were already being sold on the market.

    Some of Horgs' inventions include:

  • 'Weatherbet', which was a website on which one could bet on the weather for the next day, an idea which the following week Horgs' explained was stolen by a listener who subsequently registered the domain name, which also began Horgs' catchphrase of "invest with me; not against me".
  • The 'Horgiana', a 'comfortable shoe'; the name of which was a direct play on the brand Havaianas.
  • The 'TLC' or 'Two Level Car', an idea which he presented to Richard Branson at the opening of his Virgin Active gym in Sydney, which was, surprisingly, not totally dismissed by Richard.
  • The 'Choc Nut', which was based on Horgs' belief that if you filled the inside of a nut with chocolate, most of the chocolate wouldn't be metabolised and therefore you would not put on weight.
  • The 'Gym Train', whereby a regular commuter train would have one carriage modified into a gym for passengers to exercise on their way to work.
  • The 'See Through Toaster', which is meant to alleviate the problem of burnt toast. It will supposedly be made completely out of glass, with heat being transmitted from the bottom of the toaster and 'bouncing' around the toaster against the glass surface.
  • The 'Poo Tracker', which is based on Horgs' belief that bowel movements are an effective way of losing weight. It will be installed in the toilet bowl to measure the mass of faecal matter passed out, thus allowing a person to measure how much weight he has lost as a result of his bowel movement.
  • The 'Mint Lamb', which is based on Horgs' belief that sheep that eat only mint will naturally taste of mint when eaten as lamb meat, thus saving consumers the cost and time of the minting process.
  • The 'Fingerater', which is meant to solve the problem of sustaining cuts on one's fingers when grating foods like cheese on traditional handheld graters. This invention is such a person can wear mini graters on his ten fingers and 'massage' the cheese, thus grating all of it so that nothing goes to waste.
  • The '13 (one-three) Decide', which is a text-message service, whereby customers can send in a text message when they have trouble making a decision on any aspect of life no matter how trivial (e.g. what to eat for lunch), and Horgs will make the decision for them.
  • The 'Toilet Teasers', whereby brain teasers are printed on toilet rolls as reading material and entertainment when a person is using the toilet. The answers to the teasers will be printed further down the toilet rolls.
  • The 'I Hate Mondays' song, an idea Horgs admits isn't original but hasn't been done for '20 years', according to him. This has been the only invention thus far to take off and actually reach a second week, in which Horgs' announced the full lyrics to the song, and on the same day whilst interviewing Harry Connick, Jr., he actually performed an improvised version of the song. On Friday, 19 March 2010, it was announced that over the weekend Hamish & Andy would actually gather singers together to perform the song. It is planned to have 25 singers on the verses and 100 on the chorus (one of which will be Horgs himself). On 16 July 2010, the song was released on the Australian iTunes Store for $1.69 AUD.
  • On the show, Horgs' is well known for frequently using the catchphrase, '(Insert product) have done well over the years'. The other running joke is that most of his 'unique' ideas have actually been invented, mostly on the Japanese market.

    Jazz Chat

    After changing from a daily to a weekly show, Hamish & Andy created the segment Jazz Chat to give quick bullet point topics in the last 3 minutes of the show to make up for the lack of time they have on the new show. The Roger Clark Quartet played the background jazz music live during the segment on the 11 March 2011 show.

    The Subway Song/Musical Eavesdropping

    Started in 2011 during their time in America and now recurring occasionally, Hamish & Andy relay an amusing conversation that they overheard somewhere (originally on a subway, hence the name) word-for-word in song. Jack Post is the narrator during the segment.

    Hamish & Andy's Business Brunch (2013)

    Hamish and Andy returned to daily radio in early 2013 with a new show, originally called "Business Brunch", airing 9am to 10am Tuesdays to Fridays (except in Sydney, where it would air from 10am-11am, following The Kyle & Jackie O Show). This complimented their regular drivetime show which had moved to Mondays. Rather than having recurring segments each day, it aimed to cover every single topic in the world, focusing on one topic per show. Listeners were invited to contribute their expertise on a wide range of topics via their website, rather than through the traditional radio phone-in method. This allowed the show to be pre-recorded when necessary to facilitate filming for Gap Year. During each episode, Hamish and Andy read out and respond to listeners' contributions, who were addressed on air as "Company Man" or "Company Lady". Occasionally, the pair called listeners with interesting or humorous contributions to share more. This format was based on a series of "Boardroom" podcasts the pair recorded in 2012. The late Nine Network news personality Peter Harvey provided the voice of the introduction, even after his death (as it was the wish of him and his family).

    Business Brunch Mugs

    As a reward for listeners who made exceptional contributions to the show, the boys ordered a shipment of 50 coffee mugs with the Business Brunch logo on them. The "Mug God" (a character voiced by Hamish) had the final say on who received a coveted mug. A series of "Mug Commandments" were developed by the Mug God, mostly to prevent people who expressly asked for a mug from being eligible to receive one. Some listeners attempted to trap the boys into giving them a mug, while many were given away as reward for games developed by Hamish & Andy. One such game resulted in a caller receiving a mug for correctly guessing that a Babysitter's Club plotline, in which two of the girls were faced with a werewolf that they had to chase down a time portal to Roman times, armed with only an M16, was, in fact, made up by Hamish. Other games were harder. A much larger shipment of Business Brunch pencils was also ordered, for lesser but still notable contributions. If the contribution did not warrant a whole pencil, one might be snapped in half and sent out. A dedicated pencil-based award - 'the puncil of honour' - was given to contributors who sent in amusing puns. In the final episode of the Business Brunch on 21 June 2013, "The Promotion", the remaining mugs were donated to the National Film and Sound Archive in Canberra as part of radio history.

    Hamish & Andy's Happy Hour (2013-2014)

    The pair announced on 21 June 2013 show that they had been "promoted" to the early drive slot of 3pm to 4pm weekdays. The show was renamed "Happy Hour" and continued the aim of discussing every topic in the world. The move to this slot signaled a hiatus from their weekly 4-6pm drive show. They briefly returned to the drive slot for two weeks in July 2014 to fill in for current drive hosts Dan & Maz during radio survey break.

    Some of the old drivetime segments do occasionally feature on Happy Hour, when the boys go "off topic". For example, Jazz Chat continues to round the show off every Friday, regardless of the main topic of the day. Listeners contributing to the show via email or phone are now referred to as "Happy Chappy" or "Happy Lassie".

    Gold-Coloured Watches

    The Happy Hour Gold-Coloured Watch replaced the Business Brunch Mug as the reward for outstanding contributions to the show. 100 watches were ordered, and the first few were pillaged by Hamish, Andy and their team. As well as being issued as rewards for challenges (or blackmail), there were 19 secret ways in which to earn a watch. These included licensing an animated character you designed to the Happy Hour, or being Hamish's newborn son. Receiving a watch was considered rare, but in the extremely unlikely situation that a single listener received three Gold-Coloured Watches, they would receive a Happy Hour Sombrero, the official hat of the Happy Hour. As of May 2014, a total of 20 watches and zero sombreros had been issued.

    A batch of 1000 Happy Hour Coasters was also ordered, and these were given away as consolation prizes for contributions not quite worthy of a watch.

    In the 2 June 2014 edition of the Happy Hour, it was revealed that a gold-coloured watch had been placed on auction website eBay by its recipient, a listener named James. The boys were displeased with this, as it is impossible to assign a value to such a priceless object. In order to prevent an existing watch owner from purchasing an additional watch and getting closer to the coveted Happy Hour sombrero, the boys offered to pay James $300 cash to buy back the watch. The watch was deemed cursed and blown up (in a wheel barrow full of watermelons) using explosives. An attempt to record this event in super slow motion, thus justifying the watermelons, was bungled. In spite of this, a largely intact watch was recovered by a listener of the show some time later, at the site of the explosion. The boys then speculated that the curse could be broken by cutting the watch into several pieces and separating them forever. These pieces were then shipped to listeners deemed 'remote' enough, to prevent the watch, and hence curse, from ever being reassembled.

    Brent the Mixmaster

    First featured on the 23 April 2013 edition of the Business Brunch discussing Recipes, Company Man Brent the Mixmaster contacted the boys with his own recipe for "Drink X": a soft drink combining one part Vanilla Coke, one part Schweppes Brown Creaming Soda and one part Kirk's Pink Creaming Soda. A sample of the drink was created by Hamish, and was met with rave reviews. Brent's recipes, normally combining existing foods to "make the world a yummier place", continued to be featured regularly on the Happy Hour and he was awarded with a gold-coloured watch for his contributions to the show.

  • 9 July 2013: Chocolate - Brent sent in a recipe for an improved version of Kellogg's Coco Pops, with the addition of Big M chocolate-flavoured milk and a light-dusting with a teaspoon of Milo.
  • 26 August 2013: Burgers - Hamish & Andy rang Brent to inquire if he had a burger invention. He was invited into the studio to explain and test his recipe for a "Sauce X": a combination of the sweet-and-sour sauces available at KFC, McDonald's and Red Rooster.
  • 6 September 2013: Voting - Prime Minister Kevin Rudd brought in a recipe for the ultimate cinema food for judgement by Brent: popcorn and Maltesers mixed into vanilla ice cream.
  • 18 October 2013: Brent's Parma - Hamish & Andy dedicated an entire Happy Hour to travelling to an address given to them by Brent (which turned out to be an Indian restaurant) to taste his recipe for a new twist on chicken parmigiana, "Parma X": a chicken schnitzel with butter chicken sauce wrapped in garlic and cheese naan bread (mixed before baking).
  • 27 November 2013: Dream Week Wednesday - Brent explained the ingredients of the "Drink Xmas" he agreed to make at the end of year show to be held at Wet'n'Wild Sydney: a mixture of ice, one can of Passito soft drink, one can of Red Bull energy drink and Cottee's apple and raspberry cordial.
  • Tyreright Book of Records

    In late 2013, the boys launched their own book of world records to rival the Guinness Book of World Records. The difference with this book is that you don't need anybody to clarify or check your record, you merely need to be the first to post it on the Hamish & Andy website. Labelled the "XXXX Book of Records", the boys were open to any sponsor (alcoholic or otherwise) to purchase naming rights to the book. A Tyreright franchisee from Brisbane paid $1200 (to cover the cost of a dinghy to access the People's Island) in early 2014 and thus the book was renamed to reflect its new sponsor.

    Timomatic Autograph Business

    In 2014, Hamish started selling Timomatic's autograph on the show's website hamishandandy.com and promoting the business on the Hamish & Andy show. Hamish maintained that the autograph on sale had not been personally scribed by Timomatic, but was indeed Timomatic's autograph (the shape and style being the same). A single autograph started at a sale price of $10, but the price went through various 'sale' and 'special promotion' stages. Hamish deemed that though his business amounted to forgery, he was above being 'blown wide open', as it was a 'homage' to Timomatic. Before the Happy Hour ended in 2014, Hamish and Andy had Timomatic as a guest on the show. After testing that Timomatic could sufficiently reproduce the reproduction of his own autograph (albeit not as well), Hamish passed the business on to Timomatic, enabling him to legally sell his own autograph.

    Radio Survivor

    One day on the show, the topic of the day was Survivor, which among other topics, covered the popular reality game show of the same name. Hamish and Andy chose to play a game of Survivor over the course of a 15 minutes radio segment with callers of their show. The "Challenge" were simply arbitrary question (such as "What is your name?" and "what is your job?"). After the challenge, the contestants could strategise for the upcoming Tribal Council vote with the other but only for 10 seconds. At tribal council each contestant will say they vote, with the others on hold to ensure the votes are private. The 5 contestants for this game Josh, Laura, Steph, Nick, Mathew. The game resulted in Nick being voted by the jury to be the winner over Mathew. Later in November, Josh (who was voted out due to a "vote count error") returned to Radio Survivor for Radio Survivor All-Stars with a selection of Australian celebrities, where he won.

    Hamish Blows It Wide Open

    Hamish finds a cover up, a lie, a half/third/quarter truth, a scam, a cyber troll, a bad apple/orange/pear, a misconception, etc., and "blows it wide open". Famously, Hamish will procrastinate by adding to the list of things he blows wide open. Andy claims this is because all of the "blow wide open"-ees are insignificant. Hamish often describes how he is snowed under with all of the cases he is sent; he nevertheless reassures listeners that if they have any injustices/scandals/crackpots/forgers (unless they're doing an autograph, in which case it can be considered 'homage')/etc. for him to blow open, they should still send them in. Hamish hunts the petty thief/despot/quarter-truth/etc. down using the 'truth eagle', which shines its justice lasers on the relevant deception/scandal/swindler/crony/etc. The truth eagle had its own theme tune, played in the 25 August 2014 episode, which Andy thought was dreadful. The 6 November 2015 episode was completely dedicated to blowing things wide open, allowing Hamish to work through some of his backlog of cases.

    Friends Galore

    Cackling Jack gives Hamish and Andy the names of two similar sounding people / organisations / brands / television shows / things, and they have to decide who has a greater number of friends on Facebook. If they do not guess at least two out of the three pairs correctly, they must send a Happy Hour Coaster to the show's nemesis, Tony Barber (who stood them up for a song-writing session in late 2013). Having realised that if they lose six times, Barber will have a full set of 6 coasters, the boys decided the game would probably be retired after their 5th loss. On August 11, 2014 the Friends Galore iPhone app was released into the Apple App Store by a fan.

    Which Star Do You Think You Are?

    Hamish and Andy each choose a male and female celebrity, and then call somebody at random to ask which celebrity they think they resemble. Should the caller name one of the celebrities selected by Hamish or Andy, whoever named that celebrity is declared the winner. The loser must get that celebrity on the show before the end of the year.

    Winds Of Glory

    A segment where Hamish and Andy talk to a listener who has 'let it rip' in a noteworthy place or situation.

    Am I Naked?

    A segment where Hamish and Andy talk to a listener and guess whether the listener is naked or not.

    Jazz Up Your Anecdote

    A listener tells a story from their life that has a great start but a mundane ending. Other listeners then offer false but more exciting conclusions to the original anecdote. The owner of the story then chooses their favourite new ending and agrees to change the story to include the new ending and tell it as fact from now on.

    The Hamish & Andy Drive Show (2015-present)

    The pair announced on 29 October 2014 that the show would return to the national drive slot (4 - 7pm) on the Hit Network. They also publish a podcast that is a condensed version of their daily show, excluding ads and songs. On December 2, 2016 the pair announced 2017 will be their final year on air.

    Race That Slows Down The Nation

    In 2015, Hamish & Andy ran a horse suit race in the country town of Wedderburn, Victoria, on the Monday before the Melbourne Cup. The premise of the race was to slow down the nation safely in preparation for "The race that stops the nation"; Melbourne Cup. The race was originally designed to include horses, but as more and more people started to write to the show asking if they could enter the race in a horse outfit, Hamish & Andy, later changed the rules to be a horse suit only race, including single and double outfitted racers.

    Corn Water

    Hamish, upon noticing the recent popularity of coconut water in early 2016, wanted to enter the flavoured-water market with what he believed would be the next big hit. After logistical difficulties the idea was quickly dropped.

    Sliding Championship

    In late November 2016, the boys announced they would be hosting a sliding championship at the Melbourne Sports and Aquatic Centre. Five competitors where chosen from five of the Australian states, with the Victorian participant winning.

    Coolboys and The Frontman Tour

    In late 2015, after a request for Rob Thomas to play live on the show during an interview, was knocked back, due to his backing band not travelling with him. Hamish & Andy were promised by Thomas, that the members of the radio show could perform instead.

    Layla's Loot Chute

    One of the most highly anticipated segments in recent memory, Hamish designed, and had made for him, the bottom half of a chicken suit. Inside the suit is a pipe with a plunger that an egg is placed and "layed" by Layla. If the perfectly created chicken suit is not enough, there are no losers on Layla's Loot Chute, contestants (one per week) can win a beer or money. Contestants pick a number between one and six, which correlates to the plastic egg that is placed in Layla's chute. The money grows by $1,000 each week if the egg that the contestant picks awards them a beer. As of the conclusion of there drive show 2016 there have been no winners and the jackpot reached $7,000, thanks to Thirsty Camel.

    Tell Me Someone I Haven't Thought Of

    A listener calls in and says a famous person or character's name that the boys have not thought of in a while (generally accepted to be in the last 6 months). If Hamish or Andy has not thought of the person or character then the person wins a hat that has been sent in by various companies around Australia. If the person is not known by either Hamish or Andy, the caller is disqualified.

    The Duping Game

    A listener calls in and talks briefly about a special item that they are in possession of, the boys ask them questions about the item to try to guess if the caller really has the item or is attempting to dupe them. The winners sometimes receive a 6-inch, slight beveled, Hamish and Andy branded ruler.

    Upset Andy

    First started in April 2016, Hamish started a weekly Tuesday segment where listeners call up and explain things that may "Upset Andy". In response to the caller, Andy will explain how much this everyday action upsets him, from 'Not at all' to 'Peri Peri Hot'. This segment often gets the hashtag of #upsetandy trending, in addition the hashtag #fastandloose.

    Many things have upset Andy on the show, including:

    There has also been numerous that have not upset him, including:

    Album releases

    Hamish & Andy have released two ARIA Award-winning double-disc compilation albums, featuring highlights from The Hamish & Andy Show.

    Awards

    The Hamish & Andy Show has won 14 Australian Commercial Radio Awards (ACRAs) from 34 nominations.

    References

    Hamish & Andy (radio show) Wikipedia