The Mallard Song is an ancient tradition of All Souls' College, Oxford. Every year it is sung at the Bursar's Dinner in March and the college's Gaudy in November. But it is also sung once a century, in a special ceremony.
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The ceremony
In the ceremony, Fellows parade around the College with flaming torches, led by a "Lord Mallard" who is carried in a chair, in search of a giant mallard that supposedly flew out of the foundations of the college when it was being built in 1437. The procession is led by an individual carrying a duck — originally dead, now just wooden — tied to the end of a vertical pole. The ceremony was last held in 2001, with Martin Litchfield West acting as Lord Mallard. His predecessor as Lord Mallard was Cosmo Lang, who presided over the centenary ceremony in 1901.
The song
The words of the song are as follows:
The Griffine, Bustard, Turkey & CaponLett other hungry Mortalls gape onAnd on theire bones with Stomacks fall hard,But lett All Souls' Men have ye Mallard.CHORUS:Hough the bloud of King Edward,By ye bloud of King Edward,It was a swapping, swapping mallard!Some storys strange are told I trowBy Baker, Holinshead & StowOf Cocks & Bulls, & other queire thingsThat happen'd in ye Reignes of theire Kings.CHORUSThe Romans once admir'd a ganderMore than they did theire best Commander,Because hee saved, if some don't foolle us,The place named from ye Scull of Tolus.CHORUSThe Poets fain'd Jove turn'd a Swan,But lett them prove it if they can.To mak't appeare it's not att all hard:Hee was a swapping, swapping mallard.CHORUSHee was swapping all from bill to eye,Hee was swapping all from wing to thigh;His swapping tool of generationOute swapped all ye wingged Nation.CHORUSThen lett us drink and dance a Galliardin ye Remembrance of ye Mallard,And as ye Mallard doth in Poole,Let's dabble, dive & duck in Boule.CHORUS