The First Bad Man

Synopsis

An unnamed narrator tells a story about the history of Texas set one million years ago, when Dinosaur Dan, the eponymous villain, terrorized the state. He rustles all the cattle (brontosaurs with the heads of Texas longhorns), and runs off with all the pretty women. The primitive Texans finally corner Dan in his mountain hideout, and cleverly chisel away the outer rock, leaving behind a small rock jail with Dan inside. The final scene shows the jail still standing in modern-day Dallas, and reveals that the narrator is really Dinosaur Dan, still in jail and sadly asking "When are y'all gonna let me out of here?".