I Am Santa Claus

Track listing

1. "There's Another Santa Claus" - 2:01
2. (parody of "Here Comes Santa Claus," performed by a Gene Autry impersonator)
3. "Walkin' 'Round in Women's Underwear" - 1:55
4. (parody of "Winter Wonderland" about crossdressing)
5. "I Am Santa Claus" - 3:22
6. (sung to tune of "Iron Man" by Black Sabbath, except the last ten notes on the prominent guitar riff are replaced with five notes from Jingle Bells.)
7. "Manger 6" - 0:44
8. (parody of Motel 6 ads, narrated by a Tom Bodett impersonator)
9. "O Little Town of Bethlehem" - 2:09
10. (sung to the tune of "The House of the Rising Sun" as performed by The Animals)
11. "I Came Upon a Roadkill Deer" - 3:01
12. (parody of "It Came Upon the Midnight Clear")
13. "Teddy the Red-Nosed Senator" - 1:25
14. (parody of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer"; about US Senator Ted Kennedy)
15. "Grahbe Yahbalz" - 1:08
16. (parody of "Deck the Halls;" the name is pseudo-Yiddish for censorship purposes, song describes a gesture frequently used by Michael Jackson)
17. "A Letter to Santa" - 2:41
18. (spoken-word piece in which Vito Corleone from The Godfather writes a letter to Santa Claus)
19. "Jingle Hells Bells" - 2:38
20. (uses a riffs of "Highway to Hell" and "T.N.T."; sung to the tune of "My Favorite Things", performed in the style of Bon Scott-era AC/DC)
21. "The Kids" - 2:18
22. spoken by Bob Rivers
23. "The Magical Kingdom of Claus" - 5:53
24. (mini-musical parody of The Wizard of Oz, in which the Emerald City/North Pole is replaced with a commercialized shopping mall-type environment, briefly parodies the song "If I Only Had a Brain")
25. "The 'What's It to Ya' Chorus - 2:37
26. (parody of Handel's "The Hallelujah Chorus" from The Messiah, with the chorus insisting to the listener to mind one's own business)
27. "Didn't I Get This Last Year?" - 3:22
28. (parody of "Do You Hear What I Hear" About repeatedly getting unpleaseant gifts, if not the same ones, each year. )
29. "The Under the Tree World of Jacques Cousteau" - 3:02
30. (spoken word piece, narrated by a Cousteau impersonator)
31. "O Christmas Tree" - 2:33
32. Instrumental set to the sounds of chainsaws.

Critical reaction

J. D. Considine wrote in the Baltimore Sun that "Rivers' idea of `funny' generally seems the work of a guy who's read too many issues of Mad magazine, but there are some good bits here." Helen Bryant of The Dallas Morning News wrote "Irving Berlin, it's not" while the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette called the album "this year's hip offering."

Chart performance

By late December 2003, the album had already sold more than 100,000 copies. I Am Santa Claus entered the Billboard Top Albums chart at #180 before peaking at #106.