"Ukridge and the Home from Home" is a short story by P. G. Wodehouse, which first appeared in the United States in the February 1931 issue of Cosmopolitan and in the United Kingdom in the June 1931 Strand. It was included in the collection Lord Emsworth and Others, published in the U.K in 1937, and in the U.S. version of Eggs, Beans and Crumpets, published in 1940. It features the irrepressible Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge.
Contents
Main characters
Plot
Ukridge arrives at his friend Jimmy Corcoran's house at 3 a.m., dressed in his pyjamas and mackintosh. He relates to his friend how he had been left in charge of his Aunt Julia's house, and had come up with the ingenious idea of renting out rooms to an exclusive clientele of boarders while she was away.
For a time the plan goes smoothly. With the staff bribed to help, he fills the house with paying guests, and rakes in their money while playing the gracious host. However, meeting an old friend of his Aunt's, he hears she is returning sooner than expected, and tries to think of a way to get rid of the guests before their contracted stays are up.
After a plot to imply the drainage in the house is faulty fails, Ukridge decides to claim the house is infected with Scarlet fever, but receiving a telegram from his aunt saying she will arrive in Paris the following week, and knowing a trip there always takes his aunt a few weeks, decides to delay shutting down his plan to grab a few more weeks rent.
Soon after, the house is aroused by shooting. One of guests, a retired Colonel, convinced he has seen a burglar, opened fire with his service revolver. Ukridge calms the house, but on retiring to bed, finds Aunt Julia hiding in the cupboard, convinced the butler has gone insane. Ukridge attempts to smuggle her out of the house, but she insists on getting some things from her bedroom. Entering the room, she disturbs the guest staying there, who screams; the Colonel rushes in and opens fire once more. Ukridge, taking advantage of the confusion, grabs his coat and slips away, ending up at his friend's bedside in the small hours of the night.