If He Is Protecting Our Nation, Then Who Will Protect Big Oil, Our Children

Track listing of commercial release

1. "My, What a Strange Day With a Swede" - 4:11
2. "An Ill-Treated Hiccup" - 2:23
3. "Cast in the Haze (Been There Four Days)" - 2:46
4. "Mimi Merlot Beatnik Version" - 0:31
5. "Girl From NYC (Named Julia)" - 2:15
6. "Inside a Room Full of Treasures, a Black Pygmy Horse's Head Pops Up Like a Periscope" - 2:28
7. "Charlie and Freddy" - 1:31
8. "There Is Nothing Wrong With Hating Rock Critics" - 4:41
9. "Maple Licorice" - 0:58
10. "Barely Asian at the Beefcake Horizon" - 1:13
11. "Spooky Spider Chandelier" - 1:30
12. "Friends of Mine" (The Zombies cover) - 2:20
13. "Christmas Isn't Safe for Animals" - 3:42

Track listing of original tour-only CD

1. "My, What a Strange Day With a Swede" - 4:11
2. "An Ill-Treated Hiccup" - 2:25
3. "Cast in the Haze (Been There Four Days)" - 3:01
4. "She's My Best Friend" (Velvet Underground cover) - 3:30
5. "Mimi Merlot Beatnik Version" - 0:29
6. "Neru No Daisuki" - 3:25
7. "Maple Licorice" - 1:01
8. "Inside a Room Full of Treasures, a Black Pygmy Horse's Head Pops Up Like a Periscope" - 2:27
9. "Spooky Spider Chandelier" - 1:30
10. "Charlie and Freddy" - 1:32
11. "Girl From NYC #64" - 2:15
12. "Nickee Coco Chorus" - 1:21
13. "Friends of Mine" (The Zombies cover) - 2:28
14. "Christmas Isn't Safe for Animals" - 3:42