Clapham Town End

Lyrics

CLAPHAM TOWN END

At Clapham Town end lived an Old Yorkshire tyke Who i dealing i horseflesh had ne’er met his like. ‘Twas his pride that i aw the hard bargains he’d hit He’d bit a good mony but nivver been bit. This old Tommy Tavers (by that name he was known) Had an old carrion bit that was sheer skin and bone. To have killed him for the curs would have been quite as well, But 'twas Tommy's opinion he'd die off himsel', Well, one Abie Muggins, a neighbouring cheat, Thought to diddle old Tommy would be a great treat; He'd a horse, too, 'twas worse than old Tommy's, you see, For tonight he'd thought that he would proper to dee. Thinks Abie: "Th' old codger'll never smoke the trick: "I'll swap with him my poor dead horse for his quick, "And if Tommy, I'm nobbered can happen to trap, "'Twill be a fine feather in Abraham's cap." So to Tommy he goes, and to Tommy he pops: "Between my horse and thine prithee Tommy would swaps. "What will give me to boot, for mine th' better horse feel?" "Not," says Tommy, "I'll swap even hands and ye will!" Abie preached a long time about something to boot, Insisting that his was the liveliest brute. But Tommy stuck fast where first had begun, Till Abie shook hands and said: "Well, Tommy, done." "Oh, Tommy," says Abie, "I sorry for thee, "I thought thou'd 'a had a more white in thy 'ee: "Good luck in thy bargain, for my horse is dead." "Hey," says Tommy, "me lad, so is mine, and it's flaid!" So Tommy got the better of the bargain of asked, And came off with a Yorkshireman's triumph at last. For though 'twixt dead horses there's not much to choose, Yet Tommy was richer by the hide and four shoes.

 • Ambling of the mouldy steed (Elgar's remark on the score)