Chris Has Got a Date, Date, Date, Date, Date

Plot

In Brian's Prius, Peter takes Chris and Meg to school. In the school's hallway, Neil tells Chris he's taking Vice-Principal Brenda Maguire to the upcoming school dance, explaining that she's now single since her husband died from ALS. Chris asks Kara Morris to the dance - only for her to shoot him down and call him that robot from Big Hero 6. As Kara leaves, Chris states that the robot's name is Baymax.

After Chris is rejected by every girl that he has asked to the dance, Stewie tells him about singer Taylor Swift, who Chris is completely ignorant about. As the conversation snowballs, Stewie suggests that he ask Taylor to the dance. Stewie makes a internet video as a means to ask her out, but Chris reveals that he made his own video and asked her simply out of the blue. She posts a reply video that says she accepts, elating Chris and Stewie. Chris's date with Taylor makes its way to the local news and the Griffin family is excited at meeting Taylor when she arrives at their house to meet Chris before they head off to the dance.

Meanwhile, as Peter is goofing off in Brian's car, a businessman enters and sits down in the back seat. Assuming Peter is his Uber driver, since the car is a Prius, he hands him 20 dollars for his fare. Seeing an opportunity, Peter impersonates an Uber driver. After this encounter, he decides that he wants to be a real Uber driver and heads over to their office to apply. While filling out an application, he finds out just what little is required for the job. Hired on the spot, he turns out to be a horrible Uber driver. Peter sees an opportunity to take care of a "few" errands and "quick" stops while taking one of his fares to the airport.

After Taylor arrives, the Griffins make a good first impression (save for Brian and Meg, who are presumptuous at her movie casting choices). Taylor enjoys her time with Chris at the school dance, and during a walk in the park, the couple kiss. The next day, Brian finds a video on Bonnie Swanson's Facebook page that features Taylor mocking, insulting, and making fun of Chris. The video portrays Taylor as a heartbroken girl lashing out at Chris for the way he behaved during their dance date. Brian and Stewie resolve to talk to Taylor in her Rhode Island mansion. When Brian, Chris, and Stewie arrive, she reveals that she sabotages all her relationships "with nice guys...and John Mayer" so that she can get a lot of material for her songs. Chris manages to get her to stop.

During one of his drives, Peter's fare directs him to turn down a dark alley, where a group of Italian-accented taxicab drivers are there waiting for him. The fare explains why he led him here, and they begin mercilessly beating him. Turns out that the beating is just because he is an Uber driver, and they don't tolerate competition. Peter manages to shield himself with a Judd Hirsch medallion. As he's going into details about a fabricated story of how he obtained it, his fare burns Brian's Prius.

At one of her concerts, Taylor is booed when she refuses to play one of her heartbreak songs. To make Taylor feel better, Chris delivers a long-winded insult about her, causing her to smile and feel better. A now elated Taylor draws her crowd back in by promising to deliver one of her trademark breakup songs. As Chris, Brian, and Stewie leave the concert, their Uber driver arrives. It's Peter, beaten badly as he rolls up in Brian's now burnt and smoking Prius.

At the Griffin house, Lois mentions that Uber is a great job to have despite the fact that Peter got assaulted. As Chris talks about his experience with Taylor, Peter breaks the fourth wall by pretending to be a late night talk-show host, complete with the compulsory desk. He ends the show in a live-episode-esque manner by pointing out the stars, guest stars and Cleveland Brown and his House Band. Peter apologizes for being unable to get the Greased-Up Deaf Guy to appear. He wraps up by stating that the guests next week will be Amanda Peet and Dom Irrera. The camera zooms out to reveal the live studio audience they're performing in front of.